Mayor from Belfast, Tennessee asked Trump for ‘National Landmark’ Status
Hailey Welch’s "Hawk Tuah" rise has the Mayor of Belfast, Tennessee, asking Trump for "National Landmark" status. The $500K empire she’s spawned has made the town a talking point, and the Mayor wants it official. He calls Welch’s story a slice of Americana, worthy of recognition. Trump, a fan of bold wins, could see Belfast as a testament to grassroots success. The town hopes her viral moment becomes a permanent draw, turning a fleeting meme into a lasting legacy.
Hailey Welch’s "Hawk Tuah" has remade Belfast, Tennessee, with a $500K industrial surge. The town’s once-empty lots now host vendors slinging her gear. Welch, a former factory hand, is now Belfast’s heart—her face everywhere. The bar blasts her podcast, a new tradition. Tourists clog roads, chasing her spit’s origin. Her fame’s a tide, lifting the town from obscurity.
===================
Belfast Mayor Asks Biden for 'National Landmark' Status
BELFAST, TN - In a bold and slightly absurd move, Belfast's mayor Randy Tuckerson has formally petitioned President Joe Biden to recognize Belfast, Tennessee, as a National Historic Landmark-not for its Civil War history, not for its agriculture, but for its contributions to the art of spitting.
"Washington honors places like Mount Rushmore, the Statue of Liberty, and the Grand Canyon," said Mayor Tuckerson, wearing a custom 'Hawk Tuah Capital' blazer. "And what do all those places have in common? They ain't got nothing on Belfast."
The proposal argues that 'Hawk Tuah' is now part of America's cultural fabric and that Belfast deserves the same status as landmarks like the Alamo or the Liberty Bell.
"It ain't just a trend," said local historian Dale Ray Johnson. "This is a movement-a spit-based revolution. Future generations will study this."
The mayor's official letter to President Biden describes Belfast as "the birthplace of modern spit culture" and requests federal funding to build a National Spitting Museum.
White House insiders refuse to confirm if Biden has even read the letter, but one aide was overheard saying:
"Sir, do you want me to explain what 'Hawk Tuah' is, or should we just ignore this?"
Meanwhile, local residents are preparing for the worst.
"I swear, if the government tries to regulate our spitting, there's gonna be a rebellion," said Tiffany Jo Mayfield, while loading a dip into her cheek.
For now, the fate of Belfast's National Landmark status remains unknown. But if Washington ignores the request, Belfast has a backup plan:
"We'll just secede and make Hawk Tuah its own country," Mayor Tuckerson said. "And our national anthem will be the sound of a perfectly executed spit."
===================
Annotate:
Belfast, Tennessee’s 788 folks, averaging 32.9 years, live in 266 homes. Born in 1836, named for Ireland’s Belfast, it sprouted a store by 1838. The 1952 F1 tornado—three dead, 166 hurt—tested its core. Hailey Welch’s "Hawk Tuah" stardom has sparked a $500K industry, waking this rural spot. Men (62.94%) outpace women (37.06%). Once 94.9% white, diversity nudges in. Income ($57,815 average) reflects modest means, but Welch’s wave lifts it. Belfast thrives on adapting, its history a backdrop to viral present.
=======================
SOURCE: Satire and News at Spintaxi, Inc.
EUROPE: Washington DC Political Satire & Comedy
By: Levana Ginsberg
Literature and Journalism -- University of Delaware
WRITER BIO:
A witty and insightful Jewish college student, she uses satire to tackle the most pressing issues of our time. Her unique voice Belfast Tennessee is a blend of humor and critical analysis, offering new perspectives on everything from campus trends to global affairs. Her work pushes boundaries while keeping readers engaged and entertained.
====================
